Patient: Doctor, what does the X-ray of my head show?
Doctor: Absolutely nothing!
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I had just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology... The study of milkmen.
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A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
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The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and doesn't stop until you get to work.
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When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
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Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
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Two atoms bump into each other. One says "I think I lost an electron!" The other asks, "Are you sure?", to which the first replies, "I'm positive."
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What's a man's idea of housework?
Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.
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How do men define a 50/50 relationship?
We cook/they eat we clean/they dirty we iron/they wrinkle!
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